Get all 15 Uncle Tairy releases available on Bandcamp and save 35%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Pay Attention To Me: 10 Years Deep [2011 - 2021], Even More Disappointments [No, I Never Mixed This Shit; Blow Me]: 2011-2019, Am I Pretty Yet?, Nitrous, Part I, Tug Squad: The Essential Collection, Sun Blew Out, Read the Description, Short Stories, Volume II, and 7 more.
1. |
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2. |
Life's Opening Act
03:45
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I'm a creepy ass Uncle, I'm serious, I really am
I've got a nephew named Noah and my brother is his dad
Obviously, but I think he's catching up to speed
In the backseat asking daddy what's wrong with me
Good luck Joe, I can't explain it myself
Have fun explaining why Uncle Bill took all the pills on the shelf
And now he's at South Health under suicide watch
Cursin' at god and twitchin' with the ticks of the clock
Why's he got a pot full of piss in a bathroom full of shit?
Next to a blown subwoofer underneath a disco ball as it spins?
Probably because he mistook that broken symbolism
For that blunt object he decides to hit himself with
He just wants to give the bat back to his favorite fans
Let the pros swing the pen and retrace the plan
He had back when he decided to make a difference
But he differed himself into a different existence
And that's him: Life's opening act
That man that raps while the performers chat in the back
He's barely intact, you can pick up his screws
As they fall to floor on a front row unused
Here he is: Life's opening act
Start the night's alcohol tab and don't let him distract
He might at as well be pluggin' in the chords for the real bands
He'll leave just as broke and lonely as when the evening began
Damn, just look at this douchebag
Can't even walk across the stage, look at the feet drag!
What a fag, there's no women dancin' in his audience
There won't be any applause until the next band begins
I hope he quits, better yet I hope he stays
I could laugh at the scars on his wrists all day
Wastin' his air pushin' airwaves the audience's way
And they won't even turn around when he exists the stage
He plays no instruments, finds significance
In the rusty key he wiggles to unlock his interests
And in his band there's no clarity or even parody
Of what the stage means or what he thinks of the strings
But that's him, life's opening act
That man that raps while the performers chat in the back
He's barely intact, you can pick up his screws
As they fall to floor on a front row unused
There he is: Life's opening act
Start the night's alcohol tab and don't let him distract
He might at as well be pluggin' in the chords for the real bands
He'll leave just as broke and lonely as when the evening began
Curse another corner with a Corona aroma
Teardop tendencies surrounding the boarder
Steppin' off of the tar from the ledge of the stage
Tuckin' his hung head into his ribcage
Curse another corner with a Corona aroma
Teardop tendencies surrounding the boarder
Steppin' off of the tar from the ledge of the stage
Tuckin' his hung head into his ribcage
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3. |
Good Morning, Illinois
03:36
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Step out my barracks on the freshest of days
Feel the sun kiss my face
Welcome to Illinois
Let my voice be your guide through these towns
Let the gravel underneath you create your own sounds
From the gravel on the ground in that town
To the greatest city around
Welcome to Illinois
Suddenly I don't feel so alone
It feels good to be home
Good morning Illinois
Yesterday was a mess full of stress
And I'm startin' to get bored with this lack of progress
I've got a cup full of yes and a smoke full of lies
Leachin' off of your taxes, I'm a fuckin' parasite
Goodbye to my passions and goodnight to sex
The personality and future of David Koresh
I invested my time and energy in heartfulls
For crumbs on the floor....yesterday was awful
And today I made music at a blistering pace
And still couldn't outrun all this pain that I taste
Or even dash salt on the bland it creates
I try to move on but every step I take hesitates
I've got the template set, but can't set it straight
I've got the urge to move forward but I keep pushin' it away
So here we are, another day, under the weather claims
Disinfectin' a bar of soap, punchin' a stain
Luggin' a bag labeled change and even though it strains
The muscles in the bicep the zipper stays in place
Today's a by-product of waste from yesterday
All of the bowel movements continue to stay the same
And just as I feel ashamed for having no one to blame
For all of these half mast complaints in my brain
I rub the bagged eyes of granite on my face
Open the door and step into Chicago sun rays
Step out my barracks on the freshest of days
Feel the sun kiss my face
Welcome to Illinois
Let my voice be your guide through these towns
Let the gravel underneath you create your own sounds
From the gravel on the ground in that town
To the greatest city around
Welcome to Illinois
Suddenly I don't feel so alone
It feels good to be home
Good morning Illinois
Feelin' good as Justin, feel the bass and percussion
Trickle its way through my veins creatin' substance
I love this, days when I feel alive
The type where I don't gotta hide just to survive
As I arrive at 2:05 in the Wal-Mart parking lot
To get my triple C's and Carlo Rossi restocked
I feel a sense of shock, I mean I cannot
Remember the last time I haven't felt confined to that block
That surrounds me, each day it caves in
But today I broke free, I think I can live
Like a regular person, whatever that is
I'm just happy as hell I can stretch my limbs for a bit
It all started with just a little bit of sunlight
All I had to do was allow my eyes to view life
No plight today, no hideaways and no cause
What pretty little moss on this rock we live on
Step out my barracks on the freshest of days
Feel the sun kiss my face
Welcome to Illinois
Let my voice be your guide through these towns
Let the gravel underneath you create your own sounds
From the gravel on the ground in that town
To the greatest city around
Welcome to Illinois
Suddenly I don't feel so alone
It feels good to be home
Good morning Illinois
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4. |
Chocolate Rhame
03:12
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One step forward, a fuckin' mile back
I'd react if these feet knew how to interact
But I keep livin' this dim-lit daydream
Scenery from the past displayed on a blank screen
Two steps forward and then I'm going backwards
I'll capture the pleas from my past with last words
I keep livin' this dim-lit daydream
Scenery from the past displayed on a blank screen
Lately, I've been thinkin' too much in a skull I used to trust
Boxes labeled fuck, gift wrapped, I keep 'em locked up
Well what'd you expect, man, I live in the past
I create black holes with a large enough mass
That I can travel right past its gravitational drag
It slows down time, but never reverses the path
Crashed into the future and was labeled a psychopath
Escaped the asylum with a beer in my hand
Now here I am, tryin to revise what I know
If I'd only stayed home away from the black hole
I'd be successful, oblivious to the knowledge I'm an immigrant
Slave wage, vertebrae of an infant
Yet my interest seems to lie in tryin' to disguise
The fact I lie myself into a try
Reliving the glory days, whatever they may be
Fuck it I'll re-exist instead of existing
One step forward, a fuckin' mile back
I'd react if these feet knew how to interact
But I keep livin' this dim-lit daydream
Scenery from the past displayed on a blank screen
Two steps forward and then I'm going backwards
I'll capture the pleas from my past with last words
I keep livin' this dim-lit daydream
Scenery from the past displayed on a blank screen
I've never been very good at this whole truth mess
Fuck it, its life, trust nobody and fake progress
Continue to forget to address the stress and the rest
Of the problems that lie behind your bed rest
Lamp posts and shades all remind me of familiar days
In the past, things made sense and drifted away
I'm a solemn display, a momument to shame
Pay your condolences to all that never stayed the same
Tilt back and let your brain hit memory lane
Drive drunk itself into a ball of flames
Wake up and remember a few parts
Drink until unabashed and return to your car
Take that ride, DWI your insides
And convince yourself that feel as alive
You did when you were a kid, but you know its fake
I got a time machine, let's correct these mistakes
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5. |
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6. |
Artists
03:37
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7. |
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Everything is meaningless and we're all gonna die
...I hope I didn't ruin the surprise
There's no plot twists, no witty quips can fix this
Insignificant existence we happen to live in
I'll wish upon a star that humans will make it that far
And explore the universe to forget what we are
There's glass in the tar and there's blood in wine
There's sludge in the stream and there's love in the spine
Why...did I...decide...to try...I could have given up
Its spinning faster than it ever was
If only I could feel, existence could be enough
There's mountains to climb, tsunamis to ride
Why do I spend time on these mutants I hide?
I lie each time I get asked what I do
I exist, nothing more, nothing less, like you
There's no truth, there's only science and math
And you break into an equation of fact
You are an exact replication of the next skeleton
When you're dead and deteriorated
Tell your friends to fuckin' play this
You'll die...I'll die...You'll die...we're all gonna die
You'll lie...I'll lie...You'll lie...we know where meaning lies
...right?
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8. |
Lonely is My Lady
02:52
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I'm so fucking lonely I now discuss it in a casual tone
Even E.T. got a response when he phoned home
Dial tones become music to my ear drums
"Why don't you speak to me Uncle Tairy, how come?"
Because you fucking suck and I don't have it in me anymore
Just stay out my bars and department stores
Stained glass doors are closed, too busy jerkin' off
It ain't a synagogue, its relationship holocaust
Fuck off, can't you see it in my face?
Lonely as shit, but still wouldn't switch with your place
I enjoy knowing I can only disappoint myself
You depend on cold shoulders to shrug your mental health
Off -- better yet onto
A dish served luke warm, passive aggression haunts you
And I may taunt you on the opposing sidelines
With a beer and the lonliest of smiles I won't hide
Catch me at your grocery line, stickin' notes to your thighs
With an arrow pointing upwards sayin' "come inside"
Try to get under my skin, I'm a fuckin' crocodile
Eat you up and still continue to smile
Been more than a while since I've had to watch my words
Been even longer since I've since I turned a she into a her
I'm a nerd and I'm not smart, don't even like Pop Tarts
But I'll turn an Owen heart into turnbuckle pop art
I'll rip a fart, gasmask your asthmatic dad
Wait a minute, I'm lonely, shouldn't I be sad?
No. So leave me the fuck alone
And don't ask about the next time I'm comin' home
I know I'm a lunatic, but you aren't new to the shit
Just pretend like your emotions aren't fucking useless
Logic washes the car you purchased with liberal arts
And the music that plays in it tells you that you're smart
Yea, sweetheart...you're fuckin' unique
You stick out like a colon pushed into your left oblique
And I'm just a lunatic, pushing forward without movin' shit
Move your ego from the door and we could fuckin' use it - stupid
I'm done playin' cupid
I'm happy being ab-soul-lutely lonely with music
Do this for me, call me up
In a few months lonely enough to see if I give a fuck
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9. |
Tiramisu Back Rub
03:12
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Yea, I'm still all alone
You're getting sick of hearin it by now, I know
I'll stop sayin' it as soon as somebody starts playin' this
Harp lateral to my rib...this is bullshit
Bein' direct to chicks has not gotten me shit
Besides a porn collection and a hand full of dick
No energy to be pissed, but if that's what it is
I'd be the only motherfucker you know sayin' it
And you'd call me an asshole for crushin' the eggshells
I've been stompin along upon since '88 of April
Stay still, and water down the liquid you feel
Fuck that, how could I ever claim to be a real
Person with real thoughts, with somethin' to be taught
Grillin' someone elses words on some lips cooked raw
Seen too many of friends take the fall for a broad
Change their image into no reflection at all
You call me stubborn sittin' next to ya manchild
Watch him nod his head in agreeence all the damn while
I guess I'm the bad guy, for livin' my sad life
Interpreting sight into words, I'm an ass right?
If I'm an asshole then I'm sorry for the stench
Plug ya sensitive nose to the truth that I've lent -- you
Take it or set it down but I want it back at end
And now you're offended? Don't fuckin' pretend it
Meant anything to you when I was catering to your ways
Now that I've spoken truth you wanna make a display
Must be the first time you've run into a guy
Who hasn't lathered you with lies to dig in your thighs
It's the early disguise, the mask with soulless eyes
That guys wear around girls those first few times
They meet. While romanticizing a new fling
You shut ya mouth long enough to enchant this dream
I'm awake as can be, I'm only here for the facts
I'd rather hear my soul sing then wash my goals clean
Just to cling to the sickness inside of me
And wise up to the scheme and see they lied to me
Again -- Lonliness, my closest friend
Its you and I until the self-confined end
Keepin' my hands busy so as not to lend them
To anyone else except the one that sent them
Can't contend with this tidal wave of lies
Onn the sandbar, watchin' the fishes swim by
Knowin' they'll be victim to the next bigger species and why
Would I feel any different in the triangle of life?
Three sides, three points, enclosed by your parents
Connecting to the dots of man, woman and marriage
Place a kid in center and you're stuck in the lines
I guess I was always bound to be the outside
Where at least I know that the geometry's mine
There's always so much more mathematics to find
We are the lines and a triangle pleases the mind
But there's always so much more mathematics to find
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10. |
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Do you remember those beautiful summer days
Where we'd hang, just me, you and the crew that drifted away?
Perhaps you can recall those yellow leaves from the fall
They always seemed so much vivid when we were younger, you don't even call
No more, don't text, you could give a fuck less
About promises from the past, had to learn to forget you
That's a fuckin' regret too,
Add it to the pile of sadness while I burn the next few
Cigarettes in shaky hands, bloody fingernails, broken plans
No one there to pick me up when I get blacked out drunk again
I stumble in to the Stumble Inn order a Rum and Gin
The bartender asks what's wrong, where do I begin?
My friends stay at arm's length, I can't think straight
My days have melted into a drug fueled haze
My strange ways turn off everything but the lights
Can't stay awake during the day, I can't sleep at night
Everything I write is startin' to sound watered down
So please shut the fuck up and grab me another round
And I'll take it to go, but I may not make it back home
If I do I'll look out my bedside window and think more
Do you remember what it was like to be in love?
The rush of endorphins racin' through your blood
Do you remember the community of feelin' unity
At a party at Payty's drunk and drivin' in the Mercedes?
Maybe you forgot or did not understand that love would be lost
Or maybe you didn't love from the start
Maybe we fell apart and I was left with the crumbs
From a love you chewed up and spit out your gums, its all fucked
Everything unchained is in shambles
I took a gamble and won the bet and my prize is handle
The kind you grip while slippin' over a sinking ship
In the vast Pacific with no lifeboat to get in
This is the last song I will ever write you
I was told the worst thing a woman could do is lie to
A man, as he extends his heart with his hands
Maybe that's why there's blood all over the window I grasp
Damn,
I guess I'll just keep
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11. |
I'm a Breeze
04:04
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These days I ain't got much but nothin' left to say
If you haven' related to my cynical ways
You won't today. I'm stockpilin' change
Confusing coins for what's needed in my brain
Can't tell if its strange to find love in the pain
I use to abuse these clouds as they entertain
She said it's a shame to be so disgusted with fame
That I'm afraid of my own music and where it takes me
Break me on the steam on an embered stake
And forget to remember the breeze I've claimed
A hot wind saturates unwanted sin
As it sprawls across a land of lost hymns
Him, or you, or ma'am or sir
Doesn't matter they're just nouns we stick between verbs
And when they become plural you lose your world
Or at least the atmosphere when she becomes her
I haven't heard a kind word over the landscape
Since the cold front packed up and floated away
Wait, I thought as the temperatures rose
I'm not used to bein' alone, the time froze
And over the years I've melted back from that fear
As my current became heavier with each tear
As weird as it is, I grew to love
The moisture in the air, I mean you can't really hug
What you can't even see, the blind eyes turned to me
Turned up the steam with each pass of the breeze
Passively the aggression in me
Aggravated the molecules in my passionless being
So the next time you see what may only seem
To be the effects of two storm cells connecting
Reject me when I attempt to pass through
Or you'll let this hot wind engulf you too
Guess who? Yea, its me
The real reason its so uncomfortable to breathe
Outside the patio past the porch you see
I bet you used to think it was a beautiful thing
So naive, but that's how its gotta be
If you want your mind enchanted with lobotomy
Two ice picks chiseled into your odyssey
But regardless of the pain your wind'll never be as hot as me
Or even up to speed with the pace I plant seeds
Across the landscape of dry grass and high weeds
Find me puttin' movement into palm trees
On my to the sea which really shouldn't seem too lonely
But I got the pace of an ocean breeze
I'm not used to this land enclosing me
Another poor me eats away at the glass
I've poured again to distance myself from the past
I attract masses of travelers on vacation
I'm the kind of breeze they don't plan to stay with
To get the basics out of the way, I'll say this
I'll float into a hurricane before I play this
Shameless game known as "who's the prey"
I'm a warm breeze, your cardio's too cold to stay
The frigid pumps away, not into me
I'm a warm breeze lookin' to settle in a calm stream
So don't talk to me when you see me at the bar
You may have heard my music or think I'm a star
Or maybe I'm just a guy lookin' down on his luck
And maybe you're just drunk lookin' for a quick fuck
I refuse to be stuck in that fuckin' rotation
And wake up hungover and ashamed at a Day's Inn
Goddamnit be patient, this shit is discusting
Since when did a dick become a piece of lunch meat?
Since when did I say you could kiss my shit or touch me?
Since when did having a twat qualify you to fuck me?
You've never even hugged me, but you're hangin' on my shirt
Tellin' me nasty shit that I'll tell my friends at work
And you probably wonder why you got no guy in your life
And tomorrow you'll put back on your fuck me eyes
And you'll wake up probably pretend to be surprised
That the guy you fucked last night left with the sunrise
And surprise...You'll see me back at the bar
Just another lonely breeze calloused by life's scars
We probably look the same, I mean, I didn't float far
But there's one difference
You'll never know who the fuck you are
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12. |
Rehab and God
04:57
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13. |
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14. |
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15. |
Ugly Beautiful People
02:41
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All the ugly, beautiful people I see
Make it easy to be a beautifully ugly being
Somewhere between serene and dope fiend
Convinced that my ugly expression hides beautiful things
I've got shoe strings the color of my soul
Each time I lace 'em the more white core's exposed
Pose for me beautiful thing
Before your beauty fades and you look like me
Tweak that image and lose your skin
While the blind man laughs at your feeble attempts to win
Over an audience, but that fountain of youth
Will flush right through that thin skin coverin' you
Who are you? Do you even know?
Did that makeup cover up your cerebral?
Did you become your own sequel?
Or did you just glitter up the script of the original?
All the ugly, beautiful people I see
Make it easy to be a beautifully ugly being
Must burn your tan from the mirror to see
Your most noticeable accessory is the puppet strings
All the ugly, beautiful folks
Awoke sleeping beauty to a mirror-full of smoke
And spoke from the throat but it came from their eyes
When they choked on the hope of their ugliest lies
Most the shallow have the widest of eyes
As if they absorbed the third one from inside
They take pride in applause on the stage
But each day they see more of the audience walk away
I guess its a cruel game we play
Determine winners on criterion of constant change
Must be a strange day when you hear the mirror say
That even the fairest of all wrinkles away
I see you use your tongue for good taste
Just another reason all your words go to waste
I see that you're usin' your mind for alabis
But you're faker than the ways you claim to spend time
I see you use your discussion for nothin' but combustion
And then mistake the heat for some kind of seduction
I see you're blind to the things I see
'Cus I've seen your eyes become your penitentiary
All the ugly, beautiful people I see
Make it easy to be a beautifully ugly being
Must burn your tan from the mirror to see
Your most noticeable accessory is the puppet strings
All the ugly, beautiful folks
Awoke sleeping beauty to a mirror-full of smoke
And spoke from the throat but it came from their eyes
When they choked on the hope of their ugliest lies
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16. |
Shit Pussy
02:38
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17. |
Walk On By
02:46
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Hey there in the green skirt, hi
I got a Benz if you're sick of walkin' and you need a ride
Fuck, I lied, but I've got an orange Escort
If you're wanna give this a try, I'll even let you drive
....I didn't think that would work
Regardless of how short that skirt was
I'm just a loser feelin' down on his luck
Tryin'a stretch a slow buck, while forgettin' that loves just a drug
Insert depressing pick up line
She stared at her watch and wouldn't gimmie the time
So I tried to peel off and killed my ride
Validatin' her decision to stay on the outside
Hi, round two, how ya doin'
Not interested? Cool, I'ma keep it movin
Rounds three, four, five, six ended the same way
And by the time I got to round seven and eight
I took a break from the game with a muscle full of strain
Shattered positivity and ego much of the same
Parked my car on sun parched terrain
Started trekkin' on my own, hung head in the rain
Hey, hey, hey
Everywhere I go I start speakin' the same
Uninteresting introduction followed by uninteresting name
This time with a cynical style
Figured the tone matched the attire - while I
Made it into rounds nine and ten
I recognized my personality startin' to offend
The misled walkin' themselves into gimmicks
By eleven I didn't have much left to give it
Skipped round twelve, dipped into the night
Didn't understand it was a twelve round fight
...Alright. Let's check the scorecards
All twelve rounds go to these damn broads
Frauds! I screamed at the judges
All I heard was twenty-four delicate boots bumpin'
Against the concrete on the other side of my temple
I faded into a Just a Friend instrumental
Woke up to the Biz -- which is this
Can't even put my gloves on for these chicks
Shit, my chances come and gone
Got my ass knocked out while jammin' this song
So long to sanity, let's celebrate existence
I'm alone as shit, some feces I'm stuck with
At least I'm not that turd you took in '96
Cramped up and jammed in a sewage system
Dear little misses hoppin' into my car
Please know the transmission won't take you very far
If we run into tar the windows won't roll up
The A/C's broke and my skin could give a -
-Fuck about its appearance my heart was on clearance
Long before you hit play to unintentionally hear this
So please get that green skirt out of my ride
Do us both a favor and.....
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18. |
Burgers and Boobs
02:17
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So I picked up my burger from the table at the diner downtown
Eyesight focused entirely on the round
Piece of mutilated cow between my fingers and thumbs
Laughing over a beer at how overweight I've become
But after I lifted the calories to my face
The waiter jumped back at the thud of my burger hittin' the plate
That was a fuckin' mistake...
'Cus the commotion I'd caused had the customers lookin' my way
Which is okay because my days are a string of awkward situations
But why'd this dame get placed in
The seat where she was currently situated
Starin' at my t-shirt stained with mayo and swiss
Shit, she's still lookin' at me, isn't she?
Yes, self, indeed, and now persistently
This is why I never leave my barracks at all
I embarrass myself too frequently for the mall
Now she's takin' a stroll on over my way
Okay, time to suit up Mr. What's Your Name Face
But each pace of her feet take me somewhere too deep
To think, and open up my third eye for your wink
Goddamnit, I sip my drink, stare at my feet
"Uhhhh, what do normal people say when they greet?"
Does she notice the yellow stains on my chipped teeth
Maybe I should have shaved the stache this week-
-Ness of character will present itself to her I'm sure
When I'm searchin' for lost words to place around verbs
My world 's already hers, and we haven't spoken yet
I'm gonna write her a song, fuck it an entire set
I'll dedicate my career to you
Vacuum my sweet nothings into your tube
I love you, but the feet pace past my food
Shit, I guess she was going to the bathroom
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19. |
Hope?
01:53
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I guess we'll end this on a positive note
I'm twenty-four and grown, I write poems and travel alone
Think more than Hawking and Dawkins would condone
I'll watch my thoughts implode into a black hole
I've come-so-far towards deciferin' me
I'm a much more intelligent man than at twenty-three
Its funny to see D&DT on Visio screens
Three months later and I'm pushin' out another CD
This time the lines you read are rhymes of me
Forgive my sentimental personality
But I'm proud to be in the position I've grown
From untilled dirt I groomed cracked seeds into a pulse
Who would have known the poetry that I wrote
Would become more than stoned footnotes, they used to call me a joke
Hope? What the fuck is that?
Get back to work after work with that notepad
Bust your ass until you close the crack
And never subscribe your mind to the faith concept
Hell yea I'm hopeless, and I know this
But that don't mean I'll find somethin' to put my hope in
Bust your ass until you close the crack
And never subscribe your mind to the faith concept
Hell yea I'm hopeless, and I know this
But that don't mean I'll find somethin' to put my hopes in
That don't mean I'll find somethin' to put my hopes in
That don't mean I'll find somethin' to put my hopes in
That don't mean I'll find somethin' to put my hopes in
That don't mean I'll find somethin' to put my hopes in
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